I will never forget handing my 3 month old baby to my mother and driving off, unsure of where I was going or what I would do.
Of course, I had heard of postpartum depression, but it was darker than anything I’d ever experienced before.
It made me truly believe that everyone in my life would be better off without me, including my baby—which is absurd.
Of course my baby needed me.
I realize that now, but somehow, in that moment, I couldn’t think or act clearly.
My sister ended up calling the police. She told them she was worried about my safety, but I ended up pulling myself together and coming home before the cops found me.
It was after this incident that I finally understood why airplanes tell you to put on your own oxygen mask before helping others.
“You can’t pour from an empty cup.”
And so began my journey of self love.
There were 100 days left in 2020 when I gave myself a very specific challenge.
Every day, for the next hundred days of the decade, I would post one thing a day on social media that made me happy.
Even on my worst days, I made sure I found some pocket of joy that I could share, and slowly—
I began to re-wire my mind.
I began to make my own happiness and loving myself a priority for the first time in my life.
For example, I would run myself a warm bath or drink a cup of tea. I would meet up with a friend, or I would try something new.
Most new mothers focus 100% on their new baby, but I was learning to lift myself up in the process of loving my daughter Lily.
Now, it is 2021, and I still continue to post one thing that makes me happy every single day on my blog
That’s what self care looks like for me